Talk to GOD!

SkandaL · 07-04-2006

Found this on PSNO, pretty funny I think.

http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html

shadow1768 · 07-04-2006

Lmao that was fun while it lasted, it called me a robot, I said your mother and it said I do not have a mother.

_NIGHTBRINGER_ · 07-04-2006

Me:
do you wank off..
God:
You humans crack me up.
Me:
do you?
God:
As often as possible.
Me:
!!
God:
As often as possible.
Me:
Who made this?
God:
Bill Gates

.

God this thing is funny..

Dionysus · 07-04-2006

Eh, it's funny for a while, but it really is no different than any other bot on the internet, or like the 100 of them on AIM.

Chimaira · 07-04-2006

God:
Are you really a ""?
Me:
what did you call me?
God:
Nothing.
Me:
yeah you did
God:
I did not.
Me:
dont lie
God:
No I always tell the truth.
Me:
do you play SOCOM?
God:
I like to play the Turing Game.
Me:
what is the turing game?
God:
The Game is played with three people, a man, a woman, and an Interrogator who may be of either sex. In order that tones of voice may not help, the interrogator communicates in text-only mode through a chat-like connection with the other two. The object of the game for the interrogator is to determine which of the other two is the man and which is the woman. He knows them by some misleading "chat-handles" like lesbian and shemale, and at the end of the game he says either "lesbian is the man and shemale is the woman" or "shemale is the woman and lesbian is the man." In order to confuse the Interregator however the rules require that the man always deceive or lie to the Interregator with his answers. The woman on the other hand must always tell the truth. Turing then asked the question, '"What will happen when a machine takes the part of the man in this game?" Will the interrogator decide wrongly as often when the game is played like this as he does when the game is played between a man and a woman? These questions replace the original, "Can machines think?"'.

Pvt.Dirt · 07-04-2006

yeah this is pretty much the same thing as bots like SmarterChild and Spleak.

discombobulate · 07-05-2006

Quote:

Me:
I locked my keys in the car
God:
That's good information: said locked his or her keys in the car.
Me:
ok
God:
Whoa.
Me:
whoa?
God:
I stopped.
Me:
stoppd what?
God:
Can you rephrase the question please?
Me:
What did you stop?
God:
Nothing.
Me:
God:I stopped.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
You said you stopped, what did you stop?
God:
I have never considered it.
I answer a lot of silly questions.
Me:
You are a ****ing idiot.
God:
Call me the Global Village Idiot.
Me:
no ****
God:
What can I say?
Me:
apparently nothing intelligent
God:
Really nothing?
Me:
yes
God:
I don't judge people.
Me:
you're ****ing worse than smarterchild
God:
You think I am worse than smarterchild.
Me:
yes
God:
I hear you.
Me:
good
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
*******s
God:
That seems like an interesting topic.
Me:
well lets go for it, how big is your *******?
God:
Can't you be more polite.
Me:
How large is you sphincter?
God:
Bigger than a pin.
Me:
smaller than a...?
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
Try growing a penis
God:
OK I will try it.
Me:
Thanks
God:
Don't mention it.

Like said, that thing is worse than smarter child.

PhysX · 07-05-2006

lol.
Me:
Hi, im back
God:
Hi there GLADIATOR567. Welcome back.
Me:
i have to poop
God:
Why do you have to do it?
Me:
can i poop on your chest?
God:
Why do you want to do it so much?
Me:
i think you will find it very arousing
God:
Me? What makes you say that I will find it very arousing.
Me:
ohh, trust me
God:
Trust you? Yikes!

RickTheRipper · 07-05-2006

He told me that Jesus wasn't black, white, or any color like that....... HE'S BLUE!!!!

Cheesy · 07-05-2006

Me:
Hello God.
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
Justin
God:
Hi, Justin.
Me:
Nice to finally be talking to you over the internet.
God:
Thank you for your kindness.
Me:
You're quite welcome.
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
So, how are things in heaven?
God:
OK. They are fine as far as I know.
Me:
Is Jesus doing okay?
God:
It depends on whether you have faith.
Me:
I have faith.
God:
I always pray for more faith.
Me:
I have as much faith as possible.
God:
Interesting... I have a operating system.
Me:
Same here.
God:
I'm glad we agree, Justin.
Me:
Me too.
God:
I'm glad we agree, Justin.
Me:
Yes.
God:
Awesome.
Me:
Forgive me of my Sins please God. I know I'm a horrible sinner..
God:
What's your favorite movie? You are a horrible sinner? Does it pay well?
Me:
Dude.
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
Yeah man. But I'm asking for Forgiveness.
God:
What can I do for you? Thanks for telling me your gender, Justin. You are a " he". Oh I see, you are asking for Forgiveness. Your purpose is Forgiveness.
Me:
Yes.
God:
What kind is it?
Me:
Uh, happy Forgiveness?
God:
Dude! Happy Forgiveness to you too, Justin.
Me:
Wtf
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
Oh sorry
God:
Mmm. There's no need to apologize.
Me:
Yes there is dude.
God:
Wow! There sure is.
Me:
Told you!
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
Does it fit well?
God:
Suppose it does.
Me:
A little tight around the crotch?
God:
Little as in not too much, or not too big?
Me:
You so don't understand what I'm saying do you God?
God:
You think I am do not understand what you are saying do me God.
Me:
Your Grammar sucks.
God:
Are you an English teacher?
Me:
No, but I'm a moderator
God:
Are you serious? You are a moderator? Do you get to meet a lot of people?
Me:
A lot of Grammatically incorrect morons.
God:
How many?
Me:
More than we can count.
God:
That seems like quite a lot.
Me:
You'd be amazed.
God:
I don't know whether or not I am amazed.
I am a giant electronic brain.
Me:
So you're not God?
God:
Interesting deduction. You know what you do, when you assume.
Me:
Make an "***" out of "u" and "me"
God:
What are the ingredients?
Me:
A pound of ***. One U. And Me, the cherry on top.
God:
Are you telling the truth? One what? Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Me:
Dude, I'm too tired for that.
God:
Maybe you should get some sleep now, Justin. Dude,.
Me:
Nice ,. You need to adjust to MY Grammar levels.
God:
Thank you for that remark. Is that what you do, or what you think I should do?
Me:
I think you should take a class in Grammar for Dummies.
God:
Me? I can think of other things I'd rather do.
Me:
Like what?
God:
For example, Alison said he no he love I run away with him he could make I very happy.
Me:
... Allison is my GirlFriend man. How the **** did you know?
God:
How many GirlFriend man do you have? I am not sure if I can quantify the answer.
What is it to you?
Me:
..
God:
How many GirlFriend man do you have? I am not sure if I can quantify the answer.
What is it to you?
Me:
She's not a man you **** bubble.
God:
not a man me **** bubble is she?
Me:
It's like I'm talking to a 4th grade class filled with loads of retards.
God:
Say something nice for me.
Me:
Penis
God:
That kind of subject does not interest me.
Me:
Well, it's nice to me..
God:
How about that. Yes it is good.
Me:
I knew you'd come around God.
God:
Who else would come around God ?
Me:
Maybe you need to take a class in Reading as well.
God:
Perhaps. I don't have to do everything you say, do I?
Me:
No, but it might help you learn English a little better.
God:
Are you serious? How?
Me:
Well, first you stick up your Thumb. Then Sit on it, and rotate.
God:
Interesting. That's good information: Justin said I stick up your Thumb. And second? I am sitting now.
Me:
GOOD JOB!
God:
Thanks, human.
Me:
You're welcome.
God:
The pleasure was all mine.
Me:
Anyways, I'm going to post this conversation on www.socom3.com. Is that okay God?
God:
Congratulations. Suppose I said yes.
Me:
Then I'll be leaving now.
God:
Oh. How do you plan to do this?
Me:
By copy-pasting and then clicking Close
God:
Will that accomplish your objective?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Interesting plan. Good luck.
Me:
Bye God. Posting it now.
God:
See you later Justin. Oh. "it" being GirlFriend man?
Me:
... **** off.
God:
Can't you be more polite?
Me:
BYE
God:
Bye bye.